Finding a New Normal

So I got married last weekend. Yeah – it’s crazy. Me, married? It’s been a big shift.

From having my husband move in with me, to suddenly having someone who is my husband, to being part of a legally binding contract where if we break up we need lawyers (not that we consider divorce an option but still – lawyers). My life is seeing a lot of change.

Here in the next couple of days we’ll be leaving for our honeymoon, taking a week long vacation of just the two of us. I know this sounds silly, but it’s weird to be going on a vacation without my parents. It’s totally normal for two grown married people to go on a trip, but it’s not normal for me in my life.

In all of this transition I keep running into a whole list of these not-so-normal things of this new married life. There’s something borderline twilight zone about it,  like this is my life but this isn’t actually my life. You know what I mean?

In thinking about these little shifts in my reality, I keep searching for that firm, known ground. Things like sitting on my side of the couch or listening to a well-loved album in the car – it’s in these things I keep re-finding my old self. The comforting habits of unmarried me that feel stable in the growing pains of a new married life.

In this transition I’ve been going back to this passage from Matthew,

Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse because it is built on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash. – Matthew 7:24-27

When life feels a bit squishy, God’s still there. In the midst of transition and all of life’s changes, the same God that was with you before is with you now and will stay with you until the end.

I’m sure you’ve had life changes like these. Whether it was in a graduation when you no longer go to school anymore, or after your own marriage or maybe even a birth of a child. Something in your life has shifted and there isn’t any going back. Maybe it’s been a loss of a friendship or the passing of a loved one.

Wherever you are: remember where God is. Remember to look to Him, to rely on His stability, to find comfort in His consistency. In the good and the bad, the normal and the change, God isn’t going to change. Cling to Him and trust Him in this change; you never know what He may be doing in you through it.


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Allysha is a Jesus loving wife living in Lafayette, IN. Currently a graduate student at IUPUI, she spends her free time writing, crafting & dabbling in photography. You can find Allysha on her personal blog,, or blogging with her husband at, as well as all over the internet @allyshalynnblog.

3 thoughts on “Finding a New Normal

  1. Amen! Change is not always easy to adjust to but it can be for the better (like for you!) And yes, I also believe that God will be there for us whenever we need him 🙂


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